So I shared my bathroom with an oversized huntsman spider this week. I named him Geoffrey. We had this really weird dynamic because I have a fear of spiders and Geoffrey appeared to have a fear of humans. Every now and then I’d see him while brushing my teeth or something and I’d yell and jump back, so he would shake and jump back. We’d both then stare at each other for a few seconds then just go about our business again. Sometimes he would be a bit creepy though. He always seemed to conveniently situate himself on the top corner of the roof directly facing the shower while I was using it. Also he always seemed convinced that if he stayed still for more than 5 or 6 seconds I wouldn’t notice him as my attention span is so weak. Not that he’s that wrong. Anyway he pretty much doubled in size the past few days so I decided it was unfortunately time to end our friendship. I ran in, found him, sprayed him with bug spray and then started yelling and running when he commenced chasing me assumably angry about the whole “killing him” thing. Geoffrey was always a stickler like that. 20 minutes later a team of 3 of us finally put him to rest. But it had a happy ending when we dumped his dead body on the doormat of our neighbour’s house. They’re always complaining about something so may as well give them something to complain about. RIP Geoffrey.
– Lonely Kids Club
Attached drawing by Angie: