Monthly Archives: November 2011

The Secret Editions


Before I post anything, there is a huge sale happening right now with 40% off all tees! If you have your eye on any now is the time to grab some! Also I scribble together an Xmas card with each tee I send out. Just saying.


Ages ago I was going to get a whole bunch of one-off tees printed with awkward things written on them that I came up with while bored on a train one day. It never happened because I’m lazy but here’s some of them:

I posted a sex ad on craigslist but no one replied.

I read books on public transport to look smart.

I lead people on to validate myself.

I never registered to vote

I don’t know who magic johnson is

I buy my clothes from fancy places

If you like any tell me and I’ll get my typography skills on and make a tee for you. That would require you commenting on the blog on the facebook page though, and we all know how much you kids hate doing that. Yeah. I went there.


– Lonely Kids Club | Boutique T-shirt Label


Picture by Angie:


Hitting On Girls At Bars


Just had an epic conversation on Facebook chat with the girl I lost my virginity to. It’s weird that out of all the girls I’ve been involved with she’s the only one I still talk to / am on good terms with. We had a fascinating conversation about how she is in a long term relationship and feels somewhat trapped and like she can’t have fun. By comparison I feel like I just hang with couples or get close to friends until they go into relationships and drift off. Oh and don’t get me started on hitting on girls at bars. I’m so awkward with these things. The last time I hit on a girl she took out her phone and started texting. So I took out my phone and pretended to be texting and reading the text out loud going “Dude, total HFFA situation – hot from far AWAY!” then walked off. But really I was just playing Snake. Holy shit, I still played snake. That is how long it has been since I made a move at a bar. I got no game. Except with Monopoly. I’m Jewish, it’s sort of our thang.


– Lonely Kids Club | Boutique T-shirt Label


Picture by Angie:

Hug Rejection


So the other night I went along with a friend to a party I wasn’t invited to as a favour so he didn’t have to go alone. I was immediately worried he would run off and I would be left alone in the corner pretending to text on my phone but to his credit he stuck around. Anyhoo I bumped into one girl I had a massive conversation with while overseas and extended my arms for a hug and said we should catch up and she just stood there looking away with a catty expression. But she didn’t even move. It was so awkward. Fucking excuse me. I had to physically restrain myself from telling her she wasn’t hot enough to be that much of a bitch. I didn’t realise I was not deemed cool enough to hug a scrawny midget with an average face. Bitch was so cold she froze my phone. Literally. I needed to get a girl’s number later and it didn’t work. I don’t give out my number. I take numbers.

– Lonely Kids Club | Boutique T-shirt Label


Picture by Angie:


Bands I Like: Girls In The Eighties


According to my last.fm profile I’ve played through songs by Girls In The Eighties 260 times in the last 6 months. I fell instantly in love with their album “Teenage Royalty” and it lived in the CD player of my old car (I’ll get to that later) for months. It has all the elements of lo-fi and chillwave with this really interesting take on mixing in both heavily distorted guitars and well layered vocals that seep into the background then sneak up on you. Also Girls In the Eighties is a great name for a band. If they wanted indie cred they could change their name to Girls In The Eighties In Tokyo.


1. Your first few releases were very “bedroom pop” in their nature of being so lo-fi and trashy, but you keep the heavy distortion of guitars alive – do you just have a thing for heavy guitars?

Not necessarily. That’s just the way it turned out. There was a Big Muff in the studio we recorded at and I couldn’t help myself from using it. The guitar sound sort of a nod to the band Deadsy also. That band is the only reason girls in the eighties exist. I’d like to make a record that’s not so heavy in the future, but for the next few I will probably keep this sound. I’ve already got the next 2 albums written and waiting. I’m just trying to finish this one so I can save up money to have them recorded.

2. Do you ever get worried your vocal effects distance the lyrics from listeners too much? I got so freaked out when I was reading your lyrics for the first time because they’re so fucking deep.

It was never my intention to hide the vocals. Again, it’s just the way it turned outcat the time. I don’t have the proper equipment in my bedroom to record vocals or drums the way they should be so I had to make do with the sounds I got. If anything, I want the vocals to be heard! The lyrics are important to me. Most of the songs that will be on our new album were written shortly after I had tried to kill myself and tripped out for the first time so that probably explains why they’re so “deep”. I was using parts of my brain that I had never thought about or wanted to think about.

3. One time I played through Faceless Sonic Boom while my mum and her boyfriend were in the car and my mum nearly started crying. I don’t know if that was because of the music though.

We should put a sticker on our next album that says “Music to make your mother cry”.

4. In your music video for Yesterday’s Don’t Mean Shit there is a split second shot of a water bottle turned into a bong. Does that sort of thing influence your music a lot? (By that I mean helping re-use plastics to protect the environment, obviously.)

I don’t remember the water bottle bong? I don’t use plastics, I prefer the real thing.

5. On the topic of that video, most of it is just you and your friends repeatedly falling or toppling over. I also have a problem with falling over a lot.

I have vertigo.

6. I was blasting your music while driving down a highway and flipped over / totalled my car. As reimbursement can you write a song about me? I like long walks on the beach, winking awkwardly and using adjectives that start with the letter B in conversations whether or not the situation permits it.

I’m going to write a song for you about mothers in car crashes.

7. What’s your plan for future releases? Any chance of going back to your stripped back sound of Clean Your Room and Teenage Royalty?

I think we’re even more stripped down than ever before. Some of the songs on those albums have 20 plus tracks of background noises. The new record is just guitar, bass, keys, drums, and vocals. I do have plans to do a electronic album in a studio, but that will probably be like our fourth album or something. I’ve actually got a few songs written for that and may even re-do some of the Clean Your Room songs.


All their past releases are available to download for free on their tumblr page. I suggest you do so.


– Lonely Kids Club | Boutique T-shirt Label