Monthly Archives: October 2011

I Love You, But..


Back in high school I used to get in a lot of trouble for my drunken shananigans. One time it actually resulted in me getting dumped. This particular ex hosted a house party. I invited a few friends to come along. I got so trashed I introduced myself to her parents late in the eve then proceeded to throw up in the kitchen sink over all their cutlery and plates. While they were still in the room. I don’t think she or they were too impressed. A week later for my birthday present she got me this amazing T-shirt by Insight (Like a fake ID, a must-have for any 16-17 year old but weird for people legally allowed to drink.) and then started talking about how she doesn’t love me anymore. I had no idea what to say back because I just wanted to make sure I could have the T-shirt. So I just kind of ran along with whatever she was going on about envisioning how I was going to wear the shirt. Ironically, this blog post is not at all insightful.


– Lonely Kids Club | Boutique T-shirt Label


Picture by Angie:


My First School Dance


Fucking everything went wrong at my first school dance. My dad bought me an incredibly ill-fitted suit from Lowes that I was far too scrawny to really wear, my date ended up being a lesbian that spent the night hitting on one of the girls at my table (to her date’s dismay), and worst of all I wasn’t even invited to the after party. I still remember finally getting the nerve to ask my date to dance only for her to respond saying “No thanks” completely effortlessly. Just when I thought things couldn’t get any worse she explained she was a fundamental catholic. Gross. As we were leaving I noticed the photographer left out all the photos he took from the night across a large white table by the front door. There were no pictures of her and I together, but 3 different photos of her with the other girl from my table.


– Lonely Kids Club | Boutique T-shirt Label


Picture by Angie:


Mario Party 64


Not that this has anything to do with anything, but I was playing Mario Party on the Nintendo 64 today and the entire opening scene genuinely looks like the rest of the characters are planning on gang-raping Toad. They are all just standing there crowding around him (he is completely encircled) occasionally walking up to him and thrusting violently as some sort of weird attempt at showing their masculinity. The sequence then resolves with all of the characters charging into him at the same time quite forcefully and Toad jumping out of the pack. He proceeds to float in mid-air for awhile having some sort of epileptic fit. Not that I’m an expert but I’m guessing rape happens something like that. Also it doesn’t help that Mario and Luigi genuinely look like 80’s porn stars.

NOTE: What’s something 6 out or 7 people enjoy? Answer: Self-explanatory.


– Lonely Kids Club | Boutique T-shirt Label


Picture by Angie:

The girls at the back of my bus


For the six years I got the bus from my house to the station to get the train to school. There were three girls who would get on at the back of my bus and have the same fucking conversation every day. They would either bitch about a girl in their group of friends, talk about how amazing / how drunk they were at a house party at least one of them attended, or talk about a boy one of them liked. Often they would combine all these elements into one cohesive story, such as “OMG how good was the party on saturday night? Tom looked so hot! But kate was hitting him the whole night even though she knew I liked him. She’s such a bitch like that.” I’ve actually gone on to meet two of the girls completely separately post high-school. Awks.

NOTE: LONELY KIDS CLUB SUMMER RANGE LAUNCH IS THIS SUNDAY AT OXFORD ART FACTORY! SO MANY AMAZING BANDS PLAYING AND WE’RE DOING SOME CRAZY STUFF WITH THE PLACE. AND ITS FREE!


– Lonely Kids Club | Boutique T-shirt Label


Picture by Angie: